Musharraf Humiliated

This is a video of former Pakistani president Pervez Musharraf who was humiliated on live TV. At the annual India Today conclave, Musharraf stated that Muslims in India are treated as second grade citizens. This statement infuriated a Muslim member of the audience who made a mockery of Musharraf's statement and his policies. Musharraf's desperate attempt to salvage pride at the end is the funniest part.....

Pakistan's Fire Power... LOL

hey guys

i recently heard bout da 30% rise in indian army budget

ha ha ha

pak's goin down

i wonder what pak's gonna use

1) ROCKET LAUCHERS

2) ATOM BOMB (heard osama was buying one during 9/11)

3) AK 47 AND CARBINES

4) DESERT EAGLES

5) HUMAN BOMBS

6) NUKES

LOL DOES IT EVEN HAVE ONE

Comments at their creative best

Good one eh ??

Dubya quotes. As If . . .

He will be remembered with - a smile, a chuckle, a guffaw of even a crack of tear inducing laughter. Bush was, and will be for sometime : cannon fodder for comedians around the world. 

Says Cyrus Sahukar : "He will be famous for being the only President to crack lines that could strike most comedians dumb." . . . :P

Here are some Bushims that describe the great comic spectacle that Dubya was : 

1. "They misunderestimated me".

2. "Because he is hiding" (On why he couldnt catch Bin Laden)

3. "Its white" (On why the White House is called so)

4. "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, but so are we. They never stop thinking about ways to harm our people, and neither do we."

5. "I know that the human being and fish can coexist peacefully" (?????)

6. "I know it is hard for you to put food on your family".

7. "Lets make sure that there are times if certainty in these uncertain times . . . "

What is wrong with her ????

Take a careful look at the eyes of this tender 10 year old wearing a red dress . . . in the center of the picture, for ten seconds . . .

Part 2 : The ten commandments

So . . . let me move on with it . . .

COMMANDMENT NO.6
"Thou shalt hold up the traffic at every possible oppurtunity"

This rule dosent apply to you unless you're the first car at the traffic lights . . . if not, follow rule christened "Horn OK Please".

Back up at a busy thouroughfare, stop right in the middle of a road (Blueline coming up to you from behind : NOT A GOOD IDEA !) . . .

If anyone blows their horn, blow yours too. From an impromptu Horn OK Please band !!

COMMANDMENT NO.7
"Thou shalt sendeth the bicyclists to the great Tour De France in the sky"

As irritating as a fly on your nose, they ring their bells incessantly, scrath your paint job, and most annoyingly, reach their destination far quicker than you could ever hope for in your Air Conditioned misery. Preferably, shove a cyclist up the sidewalk, or crash it into a pedestrian. Now that would truly be two birds with one stone.

COMMANDMENT NO.8
"Thou shalt overtake from any side as thee sees fit"

It dosent matter to Alonso what side he overtakes from isnt it ? The why should it be any different for me ? Its a jungle out there and only the fittest shall survive (only those who do what they see is right and manage to pull it off) . . . So go ahead, honk your horn, flash your lights, and floor it . . . if youre lucky, you can even show the Birdie to the poor guy who gets owned . . .

COMMANDMENT NO.9
"Thou shalt assault the average bystander with lud, obnoxious music and paint job"

Paint your ride bright pink, put meaningless Hebrew hieroglyphyics vinyls, dont forget the huge exhaust pipe . . . . Play loud meaningless music (with preferable settings : Bass : 100, Treble : -4) . . . and youll get an idea of where Im going . . . If a cop catches you, pretend you know some big politician . . . with that bad a taste, he'll probably believe you too . . .

COMMANDMENT NO.10
"Thou shalt useth your internal combustion chariot to its absolute maximum, and then some."

If its a hatchback, pack in a full drum kit . . . with your whole family. If its a van (preferably an Omni), pack in a full Basketball team (the seniors) . . . the last row may have their heads up their a**es . . . but who cares ! Atleast you'll have the record for the lowest collective IQ ever in a vehicle, excluding the Indian Cricket team returning from a 10-0 defeat in Australia . . .


So there you have it fellow bloggers : the ten commandments. . . .

Next up will be : The 10 things that you should and should not do before you die . . .

Cheers !

The Ten Commandments Of Driving in India . . .

Every kid now and then . . . wants to do a Schumacher, or an Alonso . . . or lately, a Hamilton. But I, on the other hand, want to become (and am being forced to become) quite the opposite of it all . . .

You see, India's roads will never let me become a good driver . . . so why waste all that time trying ?

So, ill try to become the absolute best of the absolute worst . . . .

Here are the commandments i plan to follow :

COMMANDMENT NO.1
"Thou shalt not use the dipper"

Sure they exist, but so what ??? Common Sense exists too, but do we use it ? I'm going to blind every motorist that comes from the opposite way . . . who cares if they get shoved up a tree ??

COMMANDMENT NO.2
"Thou shalt changeth the lanes without warning"

If you dont have insurance, that's your lookout. I may even bluff you by signalling left and then going right (that's a basketball trick, isnt it Mayank ??) . . . I may even practise the divine art of lane changing . . . if Bluelines can do it, why not me ????

COMMANDMENT NO.3
"Horn OK Please"

I'd have to put them power horns that would affect pedestrians the same way in which Metallica would affect Lata Mangeshkar. Ill just search for the most irritating one that I can find, plonk it in the car, and let it rip, at every possible oppurtunity (Bummer : whos needs oppurtunities ???).
Be it a silent zone, or a mental hospital (them patients will actually start worshipping me) . . . .
150 Decibel bappi Lahiri anyone ???

COMMANDMENT NO.4
"Thou shalt always parketh in a way that would affect the maximum number of people"

Double park, block atleast 3 cars' (or 10 bikes') space. If there's a gate, be sure to park in front of it . . . . Remember : Your'e the only person that matters . . . .

COMMANDMENT NO.5
"Thou shalt invoketh the pedestrians' wrath"

Honk your horns(as usual), chivvy them to the sidewalk (Don't we have laws against jay-walking ???), Maybe bump a few. Worth checking if your car meets pedestrians' safety standards . . . If not, so what ? Sue the car company !!

So this was part one. I shall return with part 2.

Cheers.

Bush in Primary School

BUSH IN PRIMARY SCHOOL

GEORGE BUSH GOES TO A PRIMARY SCHOOL TO TALK ABOUT THE IRAQ AND AFGHAN WARS. AFTER HIS TALK HE OFFERS QUESTION TIME.

ONE LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND AND GEORGE ASKS HIM, "WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"

"BOB".

"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, BOB?"

I HAVE 3 QUESTIONS :
FIRST,WHY DID THE USA INVADE IRAQ WITHOUT THE SUPPORT OF THE UN?
SECOND,WHY ARE YOU PRESIDENT WHEN AL GORE GOT MORE VOTES?
AND THIRD,WHAT HAPPEND TO OSAMA BIN LADEN?

JUST THEN THE BELL RINGS FOR RECESS. GEORGE BUSH INFORMS THE KIDDIES THAT THEY WILL CONTINUE AFTER RECESS.

WHEN THEY RESUME GEORGE SAYS, "OK WHERE WERE WE? OH THAT,S RIGHT....... ... QUESTION TIME. WHO HAS A QUESTION?"

A DIFFERENT LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND. GEORGE POINTS HIM OUT AND ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS?

"STEVE"

"AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION STEVE?"

I HAVE 5 QUESTIONS :
FIRST,WHY DID THE USA INVADE IRAQ WITHOUT THE SUPPORT OF UN?
SECOND,WHY ARE YOU PRESIDENT WHEN AL GORE GOT MORE VOTES?
THIRD,WHAT HAPPENED TO OSAMA BIN LADEN?
FOURTH,WHY DID THE RECESS BELL GO 20 MINUTES EARLY?
AND FIFTH, WHERE IS "BOB?"...........................

50 Astounding Facts

1. If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on your right side. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on your left side.

2. If you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water. For when a human body is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.

3. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

4. Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film of bacteria on it.

5. The Mercedes-Benz motto is “Das Beste oder Nichts” meaning “the best or nothing”.

6. The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal.

7. The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks at something pleasing.

8. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.

9. Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.

10. The roar that we hear when we place a seashell next to our ear is not the ocean, but rather the sound of blood surging through the veins in the ear.

11. Dalmatians are born without spots.

12. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.

13. The ‘v’ in the name of a court case does not stand for ‘versus’, but for ‘and’ (in civil proceedings) or ‘against’ (in criminal proceedings).

14. Men’s shirts have the buttons on the right, but women’s shirts have the buttons on the left.

15. The owl is the only bird to drop its upper eyelid to wink. All other birds raise their lower eyelids.

16. The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it’s already been digested by a bee.

17. Roosters cannot crow if they cannot extend their necks.

18. The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.

19. Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.

20. Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.

21. The verb “cleave” is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.

22. When you blush, the lining of your stomach also turns red.

23. When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.

24. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle was built in 1903, and used a tomato can for a carburetor.

25. The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named Volney.

26. Google is actually the common name for a number with a million zeros.

27. Switching letters is called spoonerism. For example, saying jag of Flapan, instead of flag of Japan.

28. It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.

29. The attachment of the human skin to muscles is what causes dimples.

30. There are 1,792 steps to the top of the Eiffel Tower.

31. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.

32. Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.

33. It takes about 20 seconds for a red blood cell to circle the whole body.

34. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

35. Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.

36. The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.

37. Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.

38. In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch (and make it look like it is smiling).

39. Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command “go hang yourself.”

40. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.

41. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

42. The average person laughs 13 times a day.

43. Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are:Mizaru(See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru(Speak no evil)

44. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

45. German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.

46. Large kangaroos cover more than 30 feet with each jump.

47. Whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.

48. Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

49. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.

50. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!!